mike (don_negro) wrote,

Looking around. What could you do
if you didn't have me here blocking your view?

A piece of a song that has been playing in my head, fully arranged, with melody, since the middle of August. Now if only some more lyrics would spontaneously appear.

Fundamental constants of my universe have stopped changing every 35 seconds. Now what? I can't go back to living my life, since there's nothing to go back to. Old life gone, new life unformed. Which is great, except on Sunday afternoons alone when you're seriously considering re-reading Texas Monthly for fun. I don't believe I've been this bereft of conventional habit since I stopped breathing through my belly button.

I think ADD is self-reinforcing if mismanaged in childhood. Busy work is difficult for ADD child. Child is forced to do busy work. Pain of frustration and a sense of self-betrayal (since, dammit, you simply can't make yourself focus for longer than a rapidly diminishing period of time) are worse than the punishment for not doing work. Child retreats further into own little world when confronted with similar busy work in future. Thusly, busy work is even more difficult. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

I brush my teeth about three times more than I used before all this brain morphing started. Floss religiously, too. Told some non-forumites about my epiphany. The reactions seemed to be 'Whoa.' with vague envy and vague I'm-glad-it's-not-me highlights. Of course, one of them was loading a bowl the whole time.

It's a beauiful day. I should be somewhere other than here.

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